I want to tell you a tale of two diners, both of them me.
Crabby Christine used to hate to go out to dinner with her husband Larry. Every time Larry would suggest we go out to eat, I would have to pretend to be pleased when all I could think about was all that food I wouldn’t be able to eat, because of my AIP protocol. I was equating going out with my sweetheart of a husband with deprivation, lack, want. In other words, I was associating pain with our date instead of pleasure.
I really didn’t want to keep doing that. So I put on my coaching hat and sat crabby Christine down in my coaching chair. And I told her this, “Look, this has got to stop! Poor Larry. He deserves a wife who is excited about going out with him. And you deserve to stop feeling so miserable. It’s time to tell yourself a different story about going out to eat with your husband. It’s time to associate pleasure with your date and not pain.”
So I did three things. First, I paid attention to what was going on up there in my mind. I became aware of the story I was telling myself. And I didn’t like that story at all! It wasn’t fair to Larry, and it wasn’t fair to me. Second, I made a decision. I decided enough was enough, that I was going to change the story I was telling myself. Third, I changed my story.
Going out to eat with my darling husband became a story about spending time and connecting in a great way with Larry. It became about me getting to wear a cute outfit and feel pretty. It became about getting a night off from cooking and enjoying the lovely ambience of the restaurant.
Do you see what I did there? I changed dreaded date night into delightful date night. I turned crabby Christine into cheerful Christine. Larry liked the change, and so did I!
But I didn’t stop there. I decided to really load up on the pleasure. So every time Larry and I go out to eat now and I choose healthy foods, I remind myself what this act of self-nurturing is all about. It’s about choosing long term gain over short term gratification. It’s about choosing to feel better, to have more energy, to improve my well-being and to enjoy a better quality of life.
And that’s the secret to how I stay motivated and on track with my FLI healing program. I take a look at my mindset. What story am I telling myself about something? Is it a story that’s going to make it easier or harder to take care of myself? Am I associating pain or pleasure with what I’m doing? If I discover my mindset could be better and my story more positive and pleasurable, I gently coach myself to change that mindset and tell another story. It takes some practice and a commitment to staying mindful of what’s going on up in my head, but this process works really well for me.
This is a process that works well for my FLI coaching clients too. It helps them stay motivated and on track in their journey toward better health. If you think you too could benefit from this kind of support in your own healing journey, I invite you sign up at FLI for some extra coaching time with me. We’ll get you enthusiastic and back on track before you know it!
To our local FLI patients: Don’t forget that our next support group is on Tuesday, October 11th, at 6:30pm, at the FLI office at: 2628 El Camino Ave., Suite C-1, Sacramento, 95821. Please RSVP to 916-550-0567, to reserve your place.
To our distance FLI patients: I wish you could ALL join us for our monthly support groups at the FLI office in Sacramento. However, I want to encourage you to be sure to book your weekly coaching session with me. You do NOT have to do this alone. If you feel you need additional support- that can be arranged for an additional fee.
To our website visitors: Welcome! We’re delighted you’re here! Please take the time to have a good look around our site. If we can help you in any way or you want to learn more, please feel free to contact us.